So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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