would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
