No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drink are we having for lunch?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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