Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
