What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
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