i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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