Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Me too!

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  (503): Me too! http://tfl.nu/uciw
  Replies (34) Good night (676) Bad night (1232)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny

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  (978): it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny http://tfl.nu/hpxx
  Replies (17) Good night (726) Bad night (2553)
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  (408): View more from California

  I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate

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  (408): I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate http://tfl.nu/wgyo
  Replies (15) Good night (1928) Bad night (3377)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.

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  (517): you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs. http://tfl.nu/b4sz
  Replies (13) Good night (4671) Bad night (1189)
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  (845): View more from New York

  i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.

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  (845): i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over. http://tfl.nu/5sx1
  Replies (1) Good night (4804) Bad night (788)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend

  (917): View more from New York City

  Yeah but those French chicks did get naked

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  (404): This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend (917): Yeah but those French chicks did get naked http://tfl.nu/3ob7
  Replies (6) Good night (3132) Bad night (595)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.

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  (207): I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine.... (617): This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs. http://tfl.nu/5fub
  Replies (12) Good night (3000) Bad night (839)
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  (951): View more from California

  You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.

  (1-951): View more from California

  This is the first time I'm hearing this information.

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  (951): You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you. (1-951): This is the first time I'm hearing this information. http://tfl.nu/wdlz
  Replies (20) Good night (3740) Bad night (623)
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  (619): View more from California

  He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.

  (760): View more from California

  Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.

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  (619): He is just a personification of a vodka hangover. (760): Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes. http://tfl.nu/e8aw
  Replies (1) Good night (1045) Bad night (501)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Why did I wake up by myself then?

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  (404): Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach? (1-404): At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place. (404): Why did I wake up by myself then? http://tfl.nu/82c4
  Replies (3) Good night (1413) Bad night (402)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started

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  (248): I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started http://tfl.nu/udux
  Replies (1) Good night (526) Bad night (333)
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  (212): View more from New York

  Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?

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  (212): Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking? http://tfl.nu/s8rr
  Replies (12) Good night (1544) Bad night (463)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...

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  (905): i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head... http://tfl.nu/72nr
  Replies (1) Good night (530) Bad night (221)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack

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  (920): I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack http://tfl.nu/hqr0
  Replies (2) Good night (747) Bad night (216)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.

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  (303): So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities. http://tfl.nu/dlp3
  Replies (1) Good night (321) Bad night (180)

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