I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
