my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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