Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
