Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
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