If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize