he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
