I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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