Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize