you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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