so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
