I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
