The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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