I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
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Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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