im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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