I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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