Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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