Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize