***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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