I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
