I love black thongs
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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