Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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