i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
