They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
