omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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