How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Randomize
