Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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