so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
