Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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