I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
