I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
