Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head

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(412): guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head http://tfl.nu/nsk3

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(212): View more from New York

btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up

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(212): btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up http://tfl.nu/jzw8

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(678): View more from Georgia

Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.

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(678): Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards. http://tfl.nu/o7s2

Replies (39) Good night (1102) Bad night (5588)
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(419): View more from Ohio

This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?

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(419): This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream? http://tfl.nu/farl

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(419): View more from Ohio

you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you

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(419): you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you http://tfl.nu/zo5g

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(303): View more from Colorado

Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...

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(303): Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks... http://tfl.nu/ccgl

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(810): View more from Michigan

GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.

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(810): GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK. http://tfl.nu/7sxv

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(949): View more from California

You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.

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(949): You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic. http://tfl.nu/5o2h

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(618): View more from Illinois

I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.

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(618): I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas. http://tfl.nu/yx8c

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.

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(724): I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported. http://tfl.nu/ojxl

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(423): View more from Tennessee

So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now

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(423): So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now http://tfl.nu/44f0

Replies (13) Good night (563) Bad night (1224)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out

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(609): So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out http://tfl.nu/p08d

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(504): View more from Louisiana

You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.

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(504): You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men. http://tfl.nu/6nuf

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(912): View more from Georgia

I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.

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(912): I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there. http://tfl.nu/8rbi

Replies (12) Good night (1653) Bad night (463)
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(240): View more from Maryland

Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that

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(240): Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that http://tfl.nu/cbjn

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