Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
It's official drugs can't kill me
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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