the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You took a bar mat shot.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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