Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Randomize