I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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