Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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