All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
