He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
