I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
