someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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