Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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