I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
