I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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